Between the Fountain and the Koi Pond

I don’t want to be the next Michael Jordan, I only want to be Kobe Bryant.
– Kobe Bryant

I’ve come at this from all directions – steeped myself in videos and lore, passing(s)and replays, lower level seats (1x), glimpses on the street – glances at the gym. I’ve puzzled proximity and ineffable connection. “I’ve got this,” I want to say. But I’m only beginning. I don’t want to rehash or re-litigate what experts espouse about the legendary #28. From my solo vantage point, I want to honor Black Mamba for the inspiration and illumination he gifted me. I want to torch the vague and vagaries – eliminate excuses. Pick a focal point and focus. I also want to run as fast as Usain Bolt.

These young guys are playing checkers. I’m out there playing chess.
– Kobe Bryant

“I’ve got this,” I want to say. But this phrase will forever belong to Kobe’s daughter Gianna (#2).

In a 2018 interview on Jimmy Kimmel, the father of four daughters smiled and laughed recounting the question fans often ask – if he wished he had a son. “Gianna will be standing next to me, and it’ll be like, ‘And you gotta have a boy. You and V gotta have a boy, have somebody carry on the tradition, the legacy.’ She’s like, ‘I got this. No boy for that, I got this.'” He also talked about coaching his daughter’s basketball team – Gianna aspired to one day play for the WNBA.

An advocate for women’s sports and a tennis fan, he named Serena Williams “The GOAT (Greatest of All Time)” in a tweet after she won the 2017 Australian Open final – one Grand Slam away from reaching Margaret Court’s record of 24. In collaboration with the fiery Williams and author Annie Mathews, Kobe created Legacy and the Queen, a Young Adult fantasy about a girl who must win a tennis tournament to save the orphanage run by her father and help her best friend, who faces factory work instead of school. He wanted his daughters and all young women to realize, “that your sensitivity is where a lot of your power, your inner magic comes from.”

In 2018 Bryant won an Academy Award for Dear Basketball, a short animated film he narrated, illustrating a poem he wrote in 2015 as a farewell to the sport. The film features a score by John Williams. In the poem (a love letter), he recognizes his body can no longer meet the demands of the game and accepts his inevitable retirement.

 If you’re afraid to fail, then you’re probably going to fail.
– Kobe Bryant

A two-time Olympic gold medalist, Bryant played his entire 20 season career with the Los Angeles Lakers. Known for earning M.V.P. awards, 18 All Star Selections, scoring an 81 point game, winning 5 NBA championships and scoring 60 points in his farewell game, you don’t have to love or even care about basketball to be awed by such achievement. Driven, multi-faceted and focused, Bryant endured injuries and personal challenges that could have ended his career much sooner if not for his resilience. “Mamba mentality is a constant quest to find answers. It’s that infinite curiosity to want to be better, to figure things out. Mamba mentality is you’re going, you’re competing, you’re not worried about the end result. You’re not worried about what people may say. You’re not worried about disappointing others. You’re not worried about any of that, you’re just focused on being in the moment. That’s what mamba mentality truly is.” He also couldn’t process failure.

I don’t think limits.
– Usain Bolt

I know you wonder why I keep bringing up the Jamaican sprinter, eight-time Olympic gold medalist and world record holder in both the 100m and 200m, considered the fastest human in the world. I wonder too. I’m fascinated by the intensity and trajectory of the journey for athletes like Bryant and Bolt. For the sacrifices and rewards. I believe it’s a sense of wonder that fuels passion, sharpens focus, denies all limits – even sustains one through injuries to the edge of breaking down. How could a 6’6’ man with scoliosis be the greatest sprinter of all time? How could a man with a third degree tear in his Achilles tendon, get up and walk on his own to the bench, then make it to the free throw line after the time out – and net two free throws? For most athletes such a devastating injury could have been the end, but Bryant underwent surgery and a lengthy rehabilitation to play three more years before retiring in 2016.

I have self-doubt. I have insecurity. I have fear of failure. I have nights when I show up at the arena and I’m like, ‘My back hurts, my feet hurt, my knees hurt. I don’t have it. I just want to chill.’ We all have self-doubt. You don’t deny it, but you also don’t capitulate to it. You embrace it.
– Kobe Bryant

So now you wonder why the title of this tribute. I wonder too. On a quiet night (in late January) at Fashion Island in Newport Beach, between the fountain and the Koi pond, a tall black man with a little girl walked towards me. I see the moment as clearly as if I filmed it. But I didn’t. I replay it now over and over in slow motion – Kobe and his 3-year-old daughter hanging out together – between the fountain and the Koi pond. In the morning hours of January 26, Kobe and his 13-year-old daughter Gianna (#2) died in a helicopter crash en route to her basketball game.

While Koi fish symbolize good luck and abundance, they are also associated with perseverance in adversity and strength of purpose – and the fountain – a symbol of joy and peace.

I’d like to say “I’ve got this Black Mamba” – but I’m not there. And I still want to run as fast as Usain Bolt. There’s so much to figure out. So in the coming weeks and months when I’m out walking in the moonlight, I’ll gaze up to your vantage point high above – with wonder. May your spirit forever soar – between the fountain and the Koi pond.

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To engage with the pivotal events of Bryant’s life, check out his documentary Kobe Bryant Muse.

Philanthropy
You don’t need to be a Laker’s fan or even an athlete to be inspired by Kobe’s vision. Beyond his skills on the court, he coached young players, opened the Mamba Sports Academy (now renamed Mamba and Mambacita for Gianna), granted over 250 wishes to children battling life threatening illnesses for the Make-A-Wish Foundation, raised money for research and medical expenses for Stand Up To Cancer, gave motivational speeches and raised money for the LA chapter of After-School All-Stars, which serves 14,000 students of which 98% are youths of color. Kobe and his wife established the Kobe and Vanessa Bryant Foundation to improve the lives of young people and their families and were founding donors of The Museum of African American History and Culture.